I remember reading something fascinating years ago in the psychologist/behavioral economist Daniel Kahneman's 2013 book Thinking, Fast and Slow. (I'm paraphrasing, as I remember it--don't quote me on the details.) They did experiments where some people would put their hand into ice water for three minutes. Other people would put their hand into ice water for five minutes, but during the last thirty seconds, the water would begin to get just a little bit warmer, although still remaining very cold. The people in the first group (three minutes of icy water) rated their experience worse than people in the second group, even though the people in the second group had to endure an extra ninety seconds of hand in icy water, and an extra thirty seconds of hand in still cold water.
What the experiment (and others they wrote about too) showed was that the ending matters, and changes how we view the entire thing that preceded it.
This is the last Shabbat of the Jewish year 5785. For many of us, and for the world, this has been a year that has felt long, and painfully hard.
We cannot change the past. But maybe we can make it hurt just a bit less, by "warming the water" of these last days of 5785, by sweetening this last Shabbat of the Jewish year.
It's not too late to make sure you have a nice Shabbat meal tonight and/or tomorrow. Eat something good, maybe open up a nice bottle of wine if that's your thing. Make an extra effort to enjoy Shabbat. Pause for an extra moment, maybe, before saying the blessing after lighting candles.
We'll breathe, and sing at Kabbalat Shabbat tonight. Consider joining us, and coming.
Shul tomorrow will be short--the Torah reading will be short, the sermon will be short, there's not (much of a) kiddush. But it will be sweet, to sing, to be together. To learn together a little. (I will be leading Torah Talk on some teshuvah-themed material.)
Spend some time with (or talking with) people you care about. Do something you love--go for a walk, read a book you like (not that you feel like you should read), cook and/or eat something delicious.
Get enough sleep. Play a game.
None of this will change the past year. But it may dull its bitterness, and sweeten us so that we can enter Rosh Hashanah with hope.
Look for another email on Sunday with all the Rosh Hashanah details.
Tonight Kabbalat Shabbat will be at 6pm.
Candle lighting is 6:45pm.
Tomorrow, services start at 9am, and Torah Talk will be at about 10:10am.
Shabbat ends at 7:41pm.
All the High Holiday details are on the website here.
Let us not forget about the hostages, who have been in captivity now for 714 days, amidst the ongoing war in Gaza, where civilians continue to suffer.
May the one who makes peace in the heavens make peace over us, and over all Israel, and over all who dwell in the world.
Shabbat shalom and see you in shul,
Rabbi Noah Arnow
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MISSION: Create a welcoming community that embraces Torah, meaningful worship, lifelong learning, music, Israel, and tikkun olam, guided by the tenets of Conservative Judaism.
Phone: 314-727-1747